As Cole Porter once wrote "I've got you under my skin." Or as Stevie Wonder once sang "You are the apple of my eye." For some, those songs mean "I can't stop thinking about you and how much I love you." For me, both of those mean "You are annoying me and I want to kick your ass." Or "You're that aggravating pimple that showed up the other day."
Right off the bat, I want to clarify something. I can count their number on one hand. That is, the people who have annoyed me, with most being in the past year or so. This makes me wonder. Am I just getting cranky as I reach middle-age? Or have I achieved one of my recently-set goals -- Not to take sh*t from anyone. Learning to kick to the curb. Get out of my life, you're bringing me down. My god, being around this jerk is my second favorite thing in the world... My first being having an unclean buffalo sit on my lunch.
But recently, my annoyance level seems to have plummeted to zip. I've had a few really bad experiences. Most surrounding my attempt to build a love-life. So far, it's been like a tug of war... one jerk after another. I feel like I've entered the psych-ward of the dating scene and I can't seem to find the exit. You know what I mean. Compare it to standing in line at the supermarket with three items and a mother of five is in front of you trying to maintain her three-ring circus, a packed-full cart, and a coupon for everything. Not to mention, the sale item she argues about and eventually saves five cents.
I've written before about my definition of a friend. To me, it's someone who cares beyond "You're breathing, so I don't have to perform mouth-to-mouth, so please go away." But I've never thought about my definition of what I'm looking for in a relationship. My preference would be someone who loves me unconditionally and I'm not annoyed by. But quite frankly, I'm worried that I've settled for "You've got a pulse, let's roll."
Dating is hard. I always thought dating would be fun, but I may be reaching the age where dating my couch, a DVD, and order-in Chinese on a Friday night might be more thrilling.
From a "I can't believe a Facebook friend acceptance doesn't make us friends" shopkeeper to a "twenty-seven-year-old-going-on-eighteen" millennial to an artist whose best friend told me "Be prepared to do all the work"... (Please, I already have a long list of work to do. I'm not adding to it.) So far, all I can think to say is "Don't think it hasn't been a little slice of heaven... cause it hasn't." Thank you, Bugs Bunny for that quote.
I just can't help say "What was I thinking? Why didn't I listen to my instincts?" I really should have listened to Mother. "Get a millionaire with one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel." I can see me now... "Sign these insurance papers first, before we get naked. I'm not sure you're going to live through the experience."
CSM
Right off the bat, I want to clarify something. I can count their number on one hand. That is, the people who have annoyed me, with most being in the past year or so. This makes me wonder. Am I just getting cranky as I reach middle-age? Or have I achieved one of my recently-set goals -- Not to take sh*t from anyone. Learning to kick to the curb. Get out of my life, you're bringing me down. My god, being around this jerk is my second favorite thing in the world... My first being having an unclean buffalo sit on my lunch.
But recently, my annoyance level seems to have plummeted to zip. I've had a few really bad experiences. Most surrounding my attempt to build a love-life. So far, it's been like a tug of war... one jerk after another. I feel like I've entered the psych-ward of the dating scene and I can't seem to find the exit. You know what I mean. Compare it to standing in line at the supermarket with three items and a mother of five is in front of you trying to maintain her three-ring circus, a packed-full cart, and a coupon for everything. Not to mention, the sale item she argues about and eventually saves five cents.
I've written before about my definition of a friend. To me, it's someone who cares beyond "You're breathing, so I don't have to perform mouth-to-mouth, so please go away." But I've never thought about my definition of what I'm looking for in a relationship. My preference would be someone who loves me unconditionally and I'm not annoyed by. But quite frankly, I'm worried that I've settled for "You've got a pulse, let's roll."
Dating is hard. I always thought dating would be fun, but I may be reaching the age where dating my couch, a DVD, and order-in Chinese on a Friday night might be more thrilling.
From a "I can't believe a Facebook friend acceptance doesn't make us friends" shopkeeper to a "twenty-seven-year-old-going-on-eighteen" millennial to an artist whose best friend told me "Be prepared to do all the work"... (Please, I already have a long list of work to do. I'm not adding to it.) So far, all I can think to say is "Don't think it hasn't been a little slice of heaven... cause it hasn't." Thank you, Bugs Bunny for that quote.
I just can't help say "What was I thinking? Why didn't I listen to my instincts?" I really should have listened to Mother. "Get a millionaire with one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel." I can see me now... "Sign these insurance papers first, before we get naked. I'm not sure you're going to live through the experience."
CSM
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